We never really said break up but I am taking it like a break up and not sure what to do? She kept fighting for me to realise what Im doing and how Im behaving but I stayed firm. Love can provide the biggest lessons for growth as an individual and if we dont learn from them, we live in worry, fear, and misery. Hi Apollonia, You can do this. I was divorced from a 16yr marriage, she just came out of 4 yr relationship with her boyfriend in which was hard for her to accept. My question is, would it be a good idea to send her a bouquet of flowers with a message and maybe include an all inclusive day by the pool for her and a friend of hers? We did and she said I need to focus on other things etc. WebAnd your partner tells you that she needs time, or space. We went on many dates and even took a little getaway together for a weekend and we were both happy, we were even almost to the point of saying we loved each other. Im feeling lots of things right now, but theyre no longer really how can I help her become a better version of herself, and instead they are more like I miss what we had and I miss her. Seems like there may be something missing that is keeping her from committing to you. She said that I dont truly listen to her unless she threatens a break up and she is over it. Even though I live in apartment we share our checks and Bills in the same account. But is it too late? I get emails, comments on my YouTube videos, and remarks in my coaching session from men who have no idea what to do next when a woman they love has asked for space. Should we keep going to this dance trainings together or its better to focus on the no-call/radio silence strategies ? Just last week she seemed different and asked she needs time and space to think. Hi I recently met this girl that was super into me and was super attracted to me I had no doubt that the relationship is gonna go further we had no fights that would make things trouble in paradise. After our breakup we continued to talk each night doing daily devotions together. She forgot it was valentines today too but is committed to her studies and shes encouraged me to go out with friends instead, which I am and would have done anyway as I respect she has studies. Hope this helps! Dunno whats going on or what next to do. Recently she had some financial issues, which even her family doesnt know but she shared with me, but would not take my help. Yes, just talk to her. She doesnt like talking to absolutely anyone when shes feeling this way (shes just very upset and bummed out, basically sad is a way to put it, she likes going through stuff on her own.) Knowing she down stairs at the front desk. It is not her job to make you feel better about yourself. The thing is she still hasnt told but opened to her close friend who told me. A week before our anniversary she said she neeeded some space to work out who she is as a person and what she wants to be in her life. Due to my busy schedule if you want more advice from me I would be happy to get on a coaching call with you! But on the issue she said to me that when I do borrow money from her I should atleast try and repay well according to me right now for the past five months ive had no job but still searching so means of paying her back is close to zero. Advice Column: How To Wait For I have a video on my youtube that I think you should check out! The moment the both of you talk or see eachother again. I felt like she wasnt showing any emotion so I addressed it one day, and she broke it off and said she needed time and space to better herself. actually we didnt talk since 2 weeksbut i dont know what to do, should i contact her and just be positive and be like: hey! When a girl says "I need space", is she preparing to break up? Shall I wait for her to initiate contact? In order to figure out the sweet spot between constantly texting her and completely leaving her alone, I would recommend speaking to one of our coaches who are better equipped to give you solid advice. The biggest advice that I can give you, and this is truly important, is to focus on YOU right now. Hi my name is August Im a health care professional and work long hours I have a GF of almost 2 years and shes always nagging me about my work schedule this weekend she got very upset because I was called in to work last minute on an emergency, now I was upfront with her about my profession and work load, Im also divorced and have kids I regularly interact with and in fairness she has been flexible but she commented that I make her feel disposable and that I do whatever I want etc., not the case I dedicate as much as my free time to her as humanly possible at times going with out sleep to accommodate now she has informed me that she needs space and Ive given it to her she is also divorced and has some issues with me at times not being overly emotional Im confused HELP!!!? I try to have a conversation with her and shes on her phone reading articles. It draws a connection, it reignites an attraction to you, and we start to think, Is he okay without me? If a woman has feelings for you then she wont be OK with this. Do I wait until she reaches out to me? I told her if she wanted be alone, or she wanted me to walk away. She couldnt say. A woman never gets sick of compliments unless she is sick of you. I would encourage you to watch our videos and listen to our podcast, you can access to all this valuable information at no cost. When she got a flat tire on the side of the road I rushed to her in my work clothes and swapped it and got her a brand new tire. Meaning using the bank and such. She said she didnt know and that the main thing was that she felt guilty by not responding to my texts/calls every time. If you have, great! GF of about a year ask me for space because I wasnt showing her the 100% she was showing me. You can move on. Be careful here as she may be trying (perhaps unconsciously) to manipulate you into doing something she wants but you dont, and thinks she can get Am I doing everything right? But that doesnt mean were ready to start another relationship any time soon. Am I too nice? When she figures it out you will still be there but in the meantime look for something better. Then we had a big fight and I asked if she was over her ex, who she broke up with about 3 months before we started dating. If a If youre too needy, she feels responsible for your emotions, and shell back away because its too much pressure. So, the best thing you can do is focus on you and do things that make you happy, surround yourself around people that make you happy and wait for her to reach out. She always mentioned she wanted to live here even if when we just met and had no relationship, so she likes here. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/how-to-love-yourself-again/ However, I did have one question on when/how to communicate. Because I am committed and focused on me now, and thats how all men should be. Should I text her during this time just to tell her Im thinking of her or hope your well, or just leave her alone?? It seems as though you may be too needy and attached and this is why she asked for space. I think giving her space will give you back your sense of control but also give you time to reflect and make some changes for that not to happen again. She has told me that I have been jealous (though I dont see how), clingy and becoming dependent on her. Tip # 3 Become confident and happy. In the meantime, Ill continue reading those self-help relationship books I shelved when I met this woman. Hey Jaden. Sometimes i think is this not bothering her? She said i need space for a while. By setting boundaries and telling her you cannot continue to pick her up when she falls, you can help her own her responsibilities and create more balance. She recently moved back home after spending a week with me, a week with other family in TN, a weekend with me in Columbus, a week with her family in TN, and then spending a night with me on her way back through. It sounds like you might have pushed her away. Starting the next day she went back to her old ways while we were together of texting good morning and throughout the day. She would say, I dont want and I think so but I need my space right now. Although I dont want to do no contact, I am doing it for the betterment of myself and I do hope it brings her back. Hi Thomas, I have included the links if interested. I try to help her in anyway I can because I still love & in love with her but I dont want to seem desperate or foolish. This is our second break and the first break was around the same time frame. I was trying to explain that she is only my best friend. I have been an incredibly good husband I do more for her than most husbands would do for their wives but I work 7 days a week 12 hours a day and when I come home I just wanted to spend some time with her was I asking for too much? She said she loves me but confused about me.then we had some short arguments. What is going on? Thanks for your reply! Our amazing coaches can have a conversation with you about whats going on and help you uncover what needs to be done and how to handle it. Apollonia. If I contact she would be too needy for my part? I am so glad you enjoyed the articles! Since when she met this group she has been asking for space from me. Can I win her back or have I lost her for good? I say to step away for about a good 3 weeks and let her initiate. She does have a low sex drive and she mentioned that we dont have time for it because we are busy working full time and school or dont have a place to do it. It seems as though she has a lot going on and needs to find herself. I love her so much and want to be with her and only her, she just recently called and told me she needs space I respected this and we came up with an agreement of us texting eachother good morning babe, goodnight babe, I asked her how her day was and she called and said she needed a break, it was an emotional phone call between the both of us and it ended with her saying that it isnt me, she just needs time, and that she loves me and will call when she is ready. When I first met her she was going to file for divorce with her now ex-husband. She got very irritated and basically said FYI Im going there to help my mom food shop and when did you ever tell sit and have a talk with me and say you wanted to get together officially? I admit that I had been acting overbearing/needy/clingy the previous week. Now suddenly due to her career and family pressure, she is getting off our relationship. Im 53, married. Divorce was only used one time thats the day we fought. Also, I believe this blog may help. So I tried to dig deeper and she says that she thought she was ready for a relationship and she did really like me and how I might now think that she led me on. i break up with my girlfriend 1 month ago.im 27 yo and she 20 yo. soon as 1 says space Im out for good if we cant stay in a home and talk about the issue I cant mind read. Im not sure what I should do to save it but Im not sure if we actually broke up or just on a break. As I said it was weird because she was so in to me and vice versa so it was out of the blue.. thanks, Hello Iwan, Hi Apollonia, What I would recommend is going 30 day no contact and making sure you get your emotions aligned with you so she does not take control of them. But i was always the one to visit her as she has own place her and i dont she knew i am easy to talk to so can ask to leave I think maybe i said i love you and miss you a few times AFTER 3 months or more and a few home made pressies . By monday we texted each other but did not see each other since. The only mistake I made (not to be unkind) is while my ex and I were separated I dated (which she saw all on social media) and convinced herself I was happy without her and she had no right to contact me. Thanks for sharing your knowledge with us. Would talk daily and really connected. Even though its difficult you can push her away by being attached as this is added stress. Im so sorry that happened. However, I need some space. Shes Always out with Her Girlfriends She might not enjoy her time with you as much and might always prefer to spend time with her girlfriends. Hope this helps! When she says she needs space, heres what to do! We started off slowly and it intensified over the past few weeks. I miss her with a lot of evidence. We saw each other once when she came by the house to drop off a key, had a couple huggs and a couple kisses then she left, At this point shes been gone two weeks, so I text and asked if she would like to go out for dinner she said no it was too soon, My heart got the best of me so I apologized the next morning and told her I will leave her be from here on end. We did run into one another after 10 days of no contact. Change your life and master your attraction. I kept my cool mostly but on one of the mornings when we woke up together she said that she loved me like a brother and didnt fancy me any more. (I do question and assume a lot :/) Plus you spent the whole day working on your car so what do you mean? I became distant? She told me she needed some space, and she is still hurt from the fight and needs time to heal. I have been with my girlfriend for just over 5 years now, 7 months ago we moved in to a house we built together but over the past few months she has become very hot and cold towards me, Some days she will feel totally in-love with me and other she will feel nothing (We have spoken about how she feels, that is how she describes it). i dono what i did wrong to her for this response mam/sir! I was dating a girl that I fell in love with. I have been with my lady coming up on 2 years. and tried to change her mind, but still not effective. It can be a great thing, but there is a thing as being too much. 2 Reply Most Helpful Opinions jaykuza Follow Xper 5 Age: 40 , mho 34% +1 y I invite you to reach out to me for a session as I would like to get more information about the relationship in order to give you exact advice and get her back. Should I stop messaging he and honour that ? Hope youre well. You are your own pedestal so you deserve to be admired and treated well as well. I am glad you are doing some counseling which is helping you learn about yourself. She said i am her stress and i give her stress hence she thinks its not a healthy relationship. We seemed to agree on everything, a match made in heaven. I cant tell you if there is another chance as I cannot predict the future. Hello Salvatore, I encourage you to book a session so I can give you more accurate advice. Please please help me. That was just after Valentines Day. I was thinking of texting her later next week by just checking up on her, but thats it. What i need to do? Most guys are unable to do this. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/ If a woman states that she needs space and you follow these tips, and she honestly does not want space, after all, you will find out. She might not be able to let go of what happened in the past. But my life is going into a really confusing stage. I betrayed her trust. Its a month gone now and I feel deeply pained. She recently had some surgical procedures which were very difficult for her, and it was hard on our relationship. I check her WhatsApp status to see when she was on last. That is a great question youre asking. Just let her be. Sunday, she said she wanted to end things between us. The reason behind her stress wont go away soon though without getting in details. I made sure that I supported her with love, caring for her and her daughter, supporting her financially, and making sure she doesnt run into any obstacles. I would encourage you to invest in my master your confidence audio seminar on my product page. Minnie Mills on Instagram: "First and foremost, I want to To book a coaching session visit the top of this page and click (private coaching). I confess that I have always wanted more. Personally, I realized i did needed that time to myself to work out some stuff I felt I was done with. I have been trying to keep everything positive and encourage her with her work struggles which in her own way appreciates it, but I am not clear what is happening. I realized that i was so selfish. You master this by observing your partners behaviors and picking up on universal energies that happen in a relationship. -Apollonia. We went out and everything was great. In order for us to really be able to give you solid advice, I would recommend speaking to one of our amazing coaches about this and seeing what they say. Am I risking us growing apart by simple not reaching out or even doing anything, except working on myself? As scary as that sounds you have to understand this will make the relationship shine and develop new boundaries or show its true colors. Apollonia, Hi Apollonia! I now only try and help when she seems stressed and annoyed and comes to me, but sometimes, doesnt want to talk about it I just want space when Im annoyed like this while other times she fully vents to me. I am not sure what to do. Or with messages but no meet ups, or totally no contact? If you need more guidance, I would suggest a private coaching session https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/ What do i do i have to make this work for the kids and i love her so much i just dont know what to do being clingy and super emotional has had the opposite effect, Yesterday i said happy Easter at 8 am and 9pm she said she was busy chasing kids all day then didnt respond to my next message today i havent messaged and neither has she what do i do. She used to tell me that one thing she liked about me is my passion. 7th District AME Church: God First Holy Conference 2023 - Facebook I dont know if I should text less and see if she takes more initiative again like she did when we re-connected 2 weeks ago. Do things for her. Apollonia. I just need help!, During this time I have found a job without her knowing to show im being proactive, but I feel like her seeing I couldnt get a job was a factor turning her off as well. How should I handle my self because I want to work with her through this little issue do you think this is going to be good or bad ? The best thing you can do is focus on you and your well-being. Pull way back and start focusing back on yourself because it sounds like you might have started to lose yourself in this relationship. I recently broke up with my girlfriend in April. I do not get included in things anymore. Did I mess up the situation by texting her at all? I mean when do I pull the plug on the bank account and so on. I already know the answer, but I would like to read your response. She said I was perfect and everything she looking for in a man and she wishes we could have worked out. You are right. We even discussed going travelling together for a couple of months. Can u help me with that? Hello Matt, Its up to her to be able to walk through her fears and anxieties and go to you and talk to you about them and be open again. Why is this lady systematically destroying my world because I wanted to give my ex a second chance. If you would like to book a private session please reach out to me so we can discuss this further and I can help. But right now, focus on building your confidence again and really doing the work on yourself. Find Out The TRUTH Here! Its very painful. Thats unfortunate that there is another man. Hey J, Iv e started counseling for myself. And finally we met, and she want space, she talked a lot about my mistake at all once. I have reflected on that now and Ive been going to psychiatric therapy. You cannot just pretend to be confident because it will disappear as time goes on. I didnt message her back at all from that message. We always told each other that we are not playing any games. She responded saying thanks and asking what Im checking in on, in turn I blew it off answering the next day saying nothing in particular, just letting you know I agree with you and encourage thanking a step back. I dont text her at all unless she texts me. Pull back, focus on you, your happiness, self-esteem and self-worth come from inside of YOU not from other people. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/. Any advice? I though it was all good i am a good guy , and dont think i am that needy as never complain she goes out friends or text her much unless texts me if she says she seeing friends saturday day i ask when she wants to see me she says saturday night or sunday i come instead . If she is trying to still get over her past relationship then space is very important so she can heal and figure things out. Again, do not hang on to her, be depressed, act desperate or be afraid because in the end this is not attractive to a woman and will only pull her away even more. We argued and she left, after two week I called her and we talked, she said she had forgiven but now she is too cold and dry when we talk, because she used to call me babe, swee, love but right now she doesnt. Should I keep continuing to give her space? I respectfully gave her that space with no contact. Theres nothing we can do with that because we cant control people, right? I feel as if shes confused as to what she wants but I do not know if giver her space will solve that as she has never said she needed it. Best, Ive been dating my GF for 10 months, and today she said I need space. I was like sure thats a good idea. 2yrs ago she started dating a younger man & development strong feelings for him but he doesnt want a relationship or a title. Please help. Best, Be careful not to beg and plead for her to come back because that will just push her away more. I would highly suggest two things. I had been with my girlfriend for 3.5 years. Meaning that Ive asked her whats going and shes always saying that everything is good and well, but my gut feeling tells me others things. I promised her before that whatever it is Ill be there for her even if its heaven or hell. We used to discuss so many things together like what we will do in future, about marriage and getting settled. Thanks in advance :/, Hey AD, thank you for taking the time to read When She Says She Needs Space. This makes the attraction level very low in the relationship. Hello, I am actually in the same situation. I just wanted to bring across my situation to you, hope you can get something back to me or at least make a video about it because I cant seem to find any videos exclusive to my situation. Hi apollonia, Ive been with this girl for about 3 months and recently, I knew she was going through a tough time and I wanted to talk to her after school, she ignored me and started walking home so I walked with her and tried talking to her about it, I do feel like I was trying a little too hard and Im worried because she said she needed space and that she didnt need a relationship right now, we eventually got to her house and she told me she was going through alot and she slammed the door in my face. Variables like how long she was in that relationship and how serious it was for her will make a big difference. This is vital to every relationship because communication is key. Mind you I have been patiently waiting, understanding, supportive etc. So I let it rock for a few hours and then we said goodnight. Web4.1K views, 50 likes, 28 loves, 154 comments, 48 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from 7th District AME Church: Thursday Morning Opening Session It depends on the relationship dynamic. As long distance relationship, we meet for 2 weeks and spend 1 month away when shes back her home. If you compliment her and she says thank you with no emotion behind it or just smiles and never really takes anything from it, then its time that you stop giving her these compliments until she begins to appreciate them. Yes, I think this is a great game plan. No sex for 2 months, we lost our connection, and just days ago she was feeling good enough to have sex again. Give her space and dont put pressure on her. We then both came back to our different countries and I kept texting her as the regrets were killing me inside. Apollonia. She told me that she is unhappy with herself, she wants to go back to school, and wants to work on being happy in her own skin (my parents had told me that it looked like she was putting on weight). She told me she need space and I told her its ok, take her time to think about it and come back to me when shes comfortable with her decision. Which caused our communications issues and lead to this but there was no fighting, rarely any disagreements. It will be better for both of us to stay separate. Two weeks ago, she told me on the phone that she had this feeling of wanting to disappear and withdraw, and I told her that thats fine and that Id be waiting for her to come back when shes ready. I also noticed that she was becoming more distant and cold, but we still did things like go eat and go shopping. We have progressed the relationship by going on some domestic vacations and now booking to go away in October this year also being introduced to family and friends, on many occasions shes told me that she loves me and that Im the best guy shes been with by a clear mile! For example, I need space because I need time to take care of myself .. Youre probably feeling confused and wondering how you can fix this, right? Hi Brian, I knew that was the death message so I was very upset to start. But we are still functioning the same as if I was in the house. I would encourage you to book a session so I can help give you tailored advice. My question is, do I have a chance to get her back now? Ive been dating this girl for 4 months now, so its been short, but after 2 months I got got up in work and I complained about so many things, turning myself into a monster, every argument I had to win and well, 2 weeks ago, after I had not seen her for a week since I worked night shifts, she said she needed space and that I need to think about what this relationship means to me. And its showing in our relationship. I care for her a whole lot and only want the best for her, my intentions were only to be there when she needs me. I gave her space, just a simple hows it going message a day and thats it. A lot of people think no contact is just not to talk but the bigger picture out of all this is personal development. She said that if she keeps going like this its only going to hurt me more and she just cant allow that to happen to me. My girlfriend of 8 months (both our longest relationships) recently went distant a week ago and a few days after wanted to talk. I never did though, because she said she wanted to take it slow. Its hard dealing with the emotional roller coaster and loneliness. I suggest you book one with me so we can get things going. The last 2 months or so have been very hard. Hi, so me and my girlfriend recently broke up due to the fact that she said she is only happy when she is with me, and when i leave it is world shattering to her. I encourage you to book a session with me as I would have to know the many things that go wrong in the relationship in order to give you tailored advice.I know this is hard but I am sure if you give her space and focus on you it will help. It broke my heart and I admit I got upset. I wake up Sunday morning and i say good morning. Right now is the best time for you to reflect on yourself. Read the book, focus on you. She says she see everything she needs within me but she is clouded by the fact that I have a smaller child that is 2 yrs old. Thanks in advance. Thank you for reading When she says she needs space, heres what to do!. I really do love her and she always says same too. Pls advice and help on how to approach this and win her affection back again. My girlfriend told me that she needs some personal space. And my sudden neediness. When she dropped me to the airport she gave me a few kisses, told me she loved me and I said 2020 is going to be our year she said we will see. Because its happening to me right now. Fast forward to Friday after work she told me she was going to Yonkers (shes from Manhattan) and she usually goes to Yonkers to spend time with her girlfriends so I called her out and said you lied to me what about not wanting to go out on Fridays anymore? She suddenly realized that she is my mistress and feels guilty about causing the collapsed of my marriage. We had talked ab me opening up more, and I thought I was really trying. but after 3days i called her and she was disappointed with me! Ive also seen so many places in the past that I could have improved on I turned into someone that wasnt the man she fell for and I wish I could tell her that Im working on all of those aspects and traits in myself. But doesnt want to regret whatever decision she decides to make. Her attitude changed a lot and she says mine changed too. My lady and I are on a break, I had a tough time with work and finances this year. Some days she tells me she misses my voice or she feels weird we havent talked all day over the phone (we everyday, sometimes more than others). There also seems as though there is more to this story and I would need more details in order to give you advice. WebWhen a girl says she needs space, sometimes she just wants a couple of days to hang around the house in her PJs without seeing your face. During this time of us being out of our elements, she has become not herself Not showing much affection towards me, seeming off in all texts she sends not to me, but also not posting on Instagram (she did daily before this), things of that nature (this lead me to start thinking that something is off with her and I am just adding on to the stress she currently has). Guess there are phases she must go through to find the answer, and she will figure it out wouldnt she?
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